Saturday, May 1, 2010
People think it is holding on that makes you stronger, but sometimes it's letting go. But somehow I just can't seem to let you go,
is it because of the promise i made to you on that day? or is it because i just want to hold on to you, hoping that you'll come back to me one day.
every morning i have to wake up, knowing that you're not gonna be by my side anymore and i have to be all alone
u know how much that's killing me?..
and every night i have to go to sleep knowing i'm gonna have to live thru another day like today without you..
everyday i have to occupy myself with things, so that i don't think of you.
but i still end up thinking of you..
the thought of you being wif him, holding his hand,in his arms..
it makes me sick..
but, i aint gt any choice
i have to face reality
i have to face the fact that u won't be by my side for at least 2 years..
sigh..
I'm trying to walk away from our past
but i keep turning back
i keep thinking bout it
i keep hurting myself
over
and over again..
but
sometimes the memories are worth the pain..
and
the hundreds of hours i spent without you and missing you
are worth the few minutes i talk to you.
sometimes I just wonder how many people never get the one they want, but end up with the one they're supposed to have.
but really
i hope you're the one im supposed to have..
not just the one i want..
i wan share with you this story..you might have heard it before...i dont knw.. but just read it..
once, a girl asked a boy..
girl : am i pretty?
boy : no
girl : do you like me?
boy : no
girl : do you want me?
boy : no
girl : if i left, would u cry?
boy : no
The girl ran off crying, but the boy went after her, held her hand and said
boy : You're not pretty, you're beautiful and flawless in my eyes
I don't like you, I love you with my heart and soul
i don't want you, i need you all the time.
and if you left, i wouldn't cry, i would die..
Girl, promise me that you'll think of us, as a time so beautiful, as a time you'll always remember,as a time, that you enjoyed..
don't forget me..even if i forget you..
if you're wif someone else
always be happy with him..
don't worry bout me..
time will eventually heal all my wounds, scars and cuts..
don't worry, i don't blame you for breaking my heart..
it wasn't that we weren't meant to be together
its just that we weren't ready for forever..
i'm gonna move on.. i hope i will
i'll forget you..
and move on bravely
But. if i don't, please accept my sincerity and luv for you..pls?..
really, I'm not afraid of heights, I'm afraid of falling.
I'm not scared of the dark, I'm scared of what's in it
and
I'm not afraid of love, I'm afraid of not being loved back.
but if you really have to go..
leave quickly..
don't hold back
i would want you to stay wif me
but It's really painful to say goodbye to someone that you don't want to let go
but
its even more painful to ask someone to stay if they never wanted to stay...
sigh...
Girl, i still love you...
7:57 AM
